Since childhood I keep having a dream over and over again!
I think the dream I’ve been having relates to before independence moment!

I’m hiding under a table in a roadside house near my current home! All the Firangis’ are drinking beer! I start to shout loud, “Inqalaab Zindabaad…” and try to kill a firangi with a hammer and then all the Firangis’ pull their pistols out and shoot me up and I’m dead, I’m done!

When I was a kid, I used to be so afraid of this dream! There used to be all black after getting killed and I used to struggle a lot to come out of that darkness!
I remember I used to resist to sit in an Ambassador car because It was sure that after starting the journey I’ll get a sleep and definitely go through that dream specifically if I’m in an Ambassador!

I wasted my puberty struggling and overcoming from this dream! Because I used to be so afraid of dying! I always thought what if I sleep and never wake up! But then after a lot of horror I started to construct the dream the way I wanted it to be…
I never allowed the horror to fade from my memory I nourished it, I modified it! I allowed it to influence myself in a positive direction but I never tried to change the ending! I always wanted to die in the dream and I always died!

I never dwell upon if I’m actually capable to change the ending! I never tried because I never wanted to… maybe I cannot change the ending even if I try to… but I’ve made myself think that I can change it but I don’t want to change it!

Just because of the anxiety I didn’t use my mind and got killed! I learned one thing from this dream that you should use your mind before doing anything!

Whenever I feel low, whenever life seems so dull, I just take a sleep and my subconscious mind starts to dream the same dream! After getting in to the dream I take control and kill myself the same way they kill me. This way I’ve killed myself thousands of time! Just think that you kill yourself in a dream and wake up all alive, all fresh! Interesting! 😄

Dreams pull out from your memories and thoughts!
Just take yourself in to the situation where you’re horror-struck then pause and think, what everyone arounds you represent?!!?
Initially, the Firangis’ who killed me represented oppression! Then I assumed them as GOD-MEN who just came to kill negativity from my life!
That’s how you can change your life’s biggest fear in to your strength!

I’m a narcissist! I love myself so much that I’ve started to love my shadow too! I can never see myself dead in real!

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When you love yourself a lot then it’s better to kill yourself virtually! It’s fun to see yourself dying parallel you’re breathing so awesome!
In that dream too I don’t kill myself, I kill all the negativity, all the sadness!

People feel low and they attempt suicide and kill themselves. I can never go for a suicide even if in that specific situation my life’s best decision would be suicide but I won’t prefer to kill myself! I’ll sleep 😴 and dream and kill myself in that dream… ✌️

 

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Have you ever imagined what can be more painful than death?!!?.
Talk to the people who are 75+ who have lost all of their colleagues, friends and all the people of their age with whom they spent their childhood-Adulthood! But no one has left anymore to give them company in the old age!

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Even after getting all the luxuries-amenities all they want is to die because none of them is alive with whom they used to play, they used to talk and they used to cry! 

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At that age when they see no one of their age around them then SURVIVAL BECOMES MORE PAINFUL THAN DEATH! Each and every day they spend becomes a punishment!

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Just a thought of old days, just a black&white picture of those days can give them unstoppable tears! 

The tears wrapped with all the pain of the heart! The tears encompassing all the memories! The tears which can never be shown to the people who are the actual reason why they came out of the eyes! 

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Just imagine, What would be your life without your best friend, without your loved ones?!!? 

What would you do?!!? How would you survive?!!? 

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I always fear death but after meeting old people with these miseries I always think, “Would I too start to pray for the death after reaching at that point?!!?” “My all I want is to survive theory would take a U-Turn?!!?” These thoughts are too scary!

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If you have your grandparents at your home then just talk to them, spend time with them, insist them to tell stories of their times and then start wondering in front of them how they used to live, how they used to manage without having basic living facilities! Then see the glory, the pride on their faces! Once you try, I bet you’ll die to see the same happiness again! 😃😊😃 

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Give them reasons to live , Give them reasons for not praying for death, Give them time when Surviving alone is the actual death!

  
#BeAReason #Dadi

Suicide is not a solution!

Posted: April 10, 2016 in Uncategorized

People leave you when you need them most! 

Get ready to get bitten on your back by the one you actually assume can never do that! 

The other one who used to say, “We can never depart our ways in any condition” will run away with the first storm leaving you on the half of the road! 

And the one who says, ” You’re the most beautiful person and I can never hurt you!” will slap your face and never turn back! 

I find all these things so interesting. These things actually make life so happening! Hanging yourself to death is not a solution! 
This is life! Promises, Betrayal, Stress, Love, Cheat, Hate and disappointments are the basic essentials of life! 

I love this kind of life! 🎃🎣🀄️ #Life

  

Live before bursting!

Posted: September 6, 2015 in Uncategorized

Life is basically like a soap bubble!

.It rides on the wind, flying here and there and before you realise it, pop! It’s gone!
The substance that’s inside the bubble before bursting, where is it now?!!?

When it’s about to disappear, you think that you could’ve flown a bit higher! But by the time, it’s already too late!
Similar like us! We come, grow, start dreaming and while trying to exist we realise that we have reached nearer to the exit door and then THE END! What left behind?!!?
So the thing is nothing lasts forever! True existence is the vastness of the sky! You and me are just small happenings! 

  

#Live #Life #Death #End #Smile #Think #InspireYourself #Bubbles #UniversalStudios #Travel #Blog #Post #TravelDiaries #Singapore

January 8, 2015 11:30Am

*Office Time & am too busy with my work*

My phone rang and I picked the call up!

Me:- Hello

He:- Hello Sir, I’m speaking from HDFC bank. I want to ask if you need any kind of loan?

Me:- No, I don’t need!

He:- Listen sir, Our interest rates are very low! We’re providing @ 8.5 % which is comparatively quite low to market rates!

Me:- *Frustrated* No-No, I don’t want any loan!

He:- No Si…

Me:- Arrey, I don’t want… I’m actually busy right now!

Then I cut the phone!

January 8, 2015 05:15 pm

*Still in the office & doing no work!* *Free Time* *Light Mood*

Phone rang!

Me:- Hello!

He:- Sir, I’m talking from HDFC bank. Do you need any loan?!!?

Me:- Ya, I actually need!

He:- Ok, How much?!!?

Me:- Around 60-70Lacs! How much can you give?!!?

He:- First tell me what do you do?!!?

Me:- I’ve a Paan ki dukaan! 😝

He:- ohh, I see! How much you earn every month?!!?

Me:- ₹ 2500-3000

He:- *In a sarcastic tone* and you want 60 lacs as a loan?!!?

Me:- Yes, What’s the problem?!!? I want to start a big business!

He:- Do you have proper documents & anything to put as a security?!!?

Me:- Documents! I’ll manage and as a Shekurityy, I’ve nothing except a wife! 😜😛

He:- 😡😡

And HE cut the phone!

Life is awesome! 😀

I don’t dream! I never dream!

when I used to be a kid, I used to see a dream *May be the Time period is before independence because I’m wearing a turban & dhoti* that some British cops are sitting and drinking beers, smoking cigarettes on the first floor of the house near to my present house and I’m hiding myself under a table with an old pistol and then I come out and kill those cops and in few minutes other cops come and catch me up and beat me like hell and one officer comes to me and put the gun on my forehead and then I wake up…

I had this dream for many years and the darkness of the dream always scared me!

Except this dream I never had any dream in my whole life but I’ve the power to visualize good things *When I’m fully awaken & conscious* even if the worst phase of the life is going on…

I visualize the things or stories I like. The time I visualize I find my eyes on my forehead and everything I see over my head and that time I find myself unable to see through my eyes and spare myself from the real world! Visualization is kind of day dreaming with a purpose to get happiness!
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Once I was imagining that I’m opening a Pepsi bottle after shaking it up and the bottle cap jumped and fall down on the floor and started dancing on the floor and I liked the sound of chhan-chhan *छन-छन* and the vibration of the cap.I kept visualizing because I liked the sound and the music that cap was creating but after few seconds that sound became a noise and I wanted that cap to stop dancing so I tried to put my hand on that cap but I was unable to find the cap.I searched that cap for few minutes then I realized that I can never find that cap because it was virtual. Meanwhile, my head started blowing and eyes started to water and sting. I just wanted that sound to stop. And then sleep was the only way I could stop that sound and feel relaxed.

People dream and when they see a scary dream then they just wake up to come out of that horror! In my case, when something happened like that while visualizing, ‘closing my eyes and try to get a sleep’ is the only way to come out of that virtual world. Totally contrary! 🙂

Usually I have full control on my imaginations but when something like that happens then that makes me to re-think about my abilities! I know that I’ll struggle but one day I’ll pass the hurdle! 🙂

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Try to see the light even during the darkest moment!